I'm not sure I should comment on this because, to my eternal shame, I have Been that guy... well, almost.
I had a brief relationship with a woman I'd known for nearly twenty years... a case of "the grass is greener on the other side" .. well, I'm here to tell you... it ISN'T!! I have found THAT out Big Time, it has cost me everything I had,and I don't mean money; I mean self-respect, trust of my daughter, two VERY good friends and (nearly) my mum, dad & sister too!
I've been very lucky though... probably some will say luckier than I deserve, and you might be right. My ex-wife (to be) are now getting on better than we did for years, my daughter seems to have forgiven me, and my folks are talking to me again - just. Luckiest of all, I met someone who turned my life around completely.... she knows the whole story, and STILL wants me in her life. I feel very humbled by that, and I love her for it - and I tell her so every day I see her.
So, to the point.... why did I do it? Well, there was the "grass is greener" crap.......marriage seemed stale, I was bored, we'd known each other a lot of years (and had been "fuck-buddies" years before) all and none of that. The "thrill" of it too, being brutally honest.
Maybe it's the same with "your" guy Mellisaaa - only he's taken advantage of you BIG-TIME, without giving you any options. You sound to me like you would have blown him out straight away (and rightly so), which is likely why he didn't tell you - adding to the "kick", maybe? Who knows? Regarding the telling of his wife.. well, as Lilith said, she probably has a good idea what he's like, especially if he's done it before... which it sounds he has, and it would be YOU ending up feeling even worse, I reckon.
Sorry for going on, and "hi-jacking" your thread... but I mentioned this in a thread a while ago, without the detail; I just hope it gives even a little bit of insight into things for you. If it changes the way others here think of me, well it's a chance I'm willing to take.
Good luck with everything Mellisaaa, and don't let the b*stard get you down!
DM
Msg for Celticangel ... if you see this babe, THANKS FOR EVERYTHING!!