Soooooooooo an incident last night made me think of this.....

Have you ever used a sex product or even something not intended for sexual play that turned out to be not such a good idea???


Lilith's Good Fuck Keeping Tip of the Day~

Not all sex gel is the same... you know what stuff I am talking about???, the arousel gel that heats up or gets all tingly and comes in dif flavors. Be sure to test the product before liberally applying it to delicate, sensitive tissue (such as MY vagina) Unsafe goo can cause scalding, intense burning and definitely fuck up the sexy groove. If you check the ingredients (afterwards doh!!!) and they are the same as those in nail polish/laquer remover I suggest it may not belong on, in, or around a pussy!

Ok let's have it.... What products/ objects should not be awarded the Good Fuck Keeping Seal of Approval??

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The practice of putting women on pedestals began to die out when it was discovered that they could give orders better from there.~ Betty Grable

If I wanted your opinion, I'd remove the duct tape and ask you for it.~ Me
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One man's dream is another man's nightmare~~~~> §¤ Lilith ¤§
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After i get done laughing my ass off at lilith....

I like some stuff just called slippery stuff, it is very very this stuff but man a couple drops do the trick.

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Love...the slowest form of suicide.

CARAMEL --
My S/O once put it on my dick and began sucking me and jerking me. Well, guess what caramel is -- extremely thick and sticky. It eventually mixed with my hair at the base of my shaft and my foreskin and basically everything got completely glued together and hurt like holy hell!!!!
OUCH!

CK

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CK

"Women, you can't live with them ... pass the beer nuts." - Norm Peterson (George Wednt) on Cheers

"Sometimes you just have to say, what the fuck." - Tom Cruise in Risky Business

"It tastes so good. Once it hits your lips." - Frank the Tank in Old School

What apart from edible knickers.......NO

Oh they were horrible.....they were like eating a plastic bag!! And they stuck to my face which was not very sexy when i returned upwards!!

So all in all a very disappointing 0 out of 10 for them!!

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A fair face may fade, but a beautiful soul lasts forever

I had one lover who was amazing. Helped me to become more in touch with my sensual self. He seemed to be so experienced and smart that I just went along with anything he said and did.

Unfortunately I didn't pay close attention to everything he did when we were together and one time he slipped some lotion on himself to keep things going. I didn't catch it but I did notice an odd coconut scent in the air. I realised afterwards that he had used sun tan lotion! I got the most painful yeast infection on the face of the earth!!!! I gave him such hell when he called me after that! He was surprised I got one! Guess he wasn't as smart as I thought he was. But he still rates pretty high on my best fuck lists.

So I've learned a valuable lesson. Keep my eyes and nose open at all times.

Sweet Chastity

althou not sexual the other day had some muscle ache
at the top of my leg so i rubbed on some cream as with
lilith i got a tingleing then a heat buld up now i must have
not been careful enogh because my whole crotch area
was tingeling and hot burning sensashon went away
after a while bit had me jumping around for a bit

Me and a gf tried to use a foam contraceptive once...
If you've ever heard Eddie Murphy saying "flames shoot out my dick" you know what I was feeling. I couldn't pee all day 'cause it burned so bad... probably the most uncomfortable 14 hours I've ever experienced after sex.

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Put me on wheels and I'll turn tricks.

Clever? Nah, I ran out of that years ago. But if you find this, let me know, k?
"The road goes ever on..." ~ Tolkien

In memory of my friend skip...
Go then, there are other worlds than these

Picked up some flavored oil at the adult video store, not sure if it had nail polish remover in it, but I was quickly informed that it did NOT feel good on freshly shaven sensitive areas...won't make that mistake again...

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Plug me into somethin'

If the theory does not conform to the facts, then the facts must be discarded.

No good deed ever goes unpunished

Never argue with an idiot. He'll drag you down to his level, & beat you with experience.

I think I posted about this right after I first joined Pixies but there are so many new members since then I'll go ahead and re-tell the tale.

Way back in the Stone Age, when I was a mere child of 16....I was in bed with the guy I was seeing at the time. He felt he needed to use a lubricant and so got up to retrieve the Vaseline from the bathroom. He didn't want to turn the lights on so he just grabbed for it in the dark. Well, he should have turned on the lights.......instead of Vaseline he ended up grabbing the jar of Vicks Vapo Rub! Let me tell you it was not a pleasant feeling!! OMG!! It burned like all the fires of Hell!! It's been many years but I can still feel the pain!!
So take warning...always be sure what you're grabbing for in the dark!!

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"They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety" Benjamin Franklin
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My Stories:
Dream Date
Just Desserts
Internet Lovers Meet - Part 1
Internet Lovers Meet - Part 2
Internet Lovers Meet - Part 3
RAVISHED!!
My Birthday - A Fantasy

Lilith,

There are some vicious rumours about me and "Deflating Debbie",

the only inflatable surrogate partner guaranteed to go down on you.

Let me take this opportunity to categorically deny these rumours

and remind you what can be done to alter photos.

OF

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Calm, quiet, smooth, devastating

Hah... we bought these wonderful contraceptive devices, the *vaginal contraceptive films*. We being unversed in the use of spermicides did not know that to get it in your mouth not only tastes bad but causes your tongue to go numb.

But as far as their actual use as a contraceptive, they rule.

Honey is just as bad as caramel. What a mess.

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Mrs. WI and I were on our honeymoon in romantic Venice.




























And I poured cognac on her hoo hoo.

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Though I am different from you,
We were born involved in one another.

For it was not into my ear you whispered, but into my heart. It was not my lips you kissed, but my soul.

Complete surrender should not just come at moments in which one faces overwhelming odds, but in the calm when it seems one is personally in complete control of one's life.

this isnt a sex thing but its a warning
once on holiday mrs k decided to be extra nice and put tooth paste on my toothbrush
well after 30 seconds i started thinking this stuff is horrible it tastes like oil and isnt getting foamy
so i ask mrs k what tooth paste she put on "the one with the yellow label " she replied
i picked it up to read on the label
SUNTAN CREAM AHHHHH shes trying to kill me
so the warning dont trust anyone else with anything that goes in or around ya body

^^^^^Ewwwww!!

I once had oral while he was eating an altoid. I couldnt get in the shower fast enough to get that burning pain off me. OUCH!!

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Just when the caterpiller thought the world was over, it became a butterfly!

Owning Pita, by my JassWolf!!
My Story~ Friday Night Spanking